Geoffrey Stanton

Born in a log cabin, Geoffrey Stanton taught himself to read and write by candlelight. He was raised by his adoptive parents—a pair of ravenous wolves who had presumably devoured the cabin’s original tenants. By the age of sixteen, Geoffrey was adept at whittling tiny fantasy animals out of discarded wedges of Dove bar soap, salvaged from the dumpsters of a nearby insane asylum. With the help of a kind-hearted local photographer, Geoffrey put together a portfolio of his works, entitled “Someday the Hippogriffs Will Scrub Us All Clean”. He received a generous pity scholarship to New College of Florida, an elite liberal arts college Sarasota, where he pursued a major in Theoretical History. He moved to New York City in 2011, saying that being considered a Floridian was too undignified, “even for a feral madman, reared by the very beasts that murdered his birth parents”. Today he works creating content for Private Island Entertainment and spends his free time making angry collages out of old pencil stubs and salvaged rebar.