Elf Fashion Guideposted on 11/29/13
How does Santa get his crap together to deliver toys to children around the world? He doesn’t outsource, he doesn’t have an agent or a manager or roadies. Everyone knows that Santa doesn’t lift a finger because he has mad ELVES. Elves make the toys, Elves clean the workshop, Elves take care of the reindeer, Santa would probably make the Elves chew his food for him too if that wasn’t against North Pole Labor Laws. For these Holiday Heroes with the worst job, luckily they may be the best dressed, pointy hats, leggings, curly shoes and brightly colored tunics, they are the flashiest peasants in all of wonderland, so let’s get started and break their style down with Private Island’s Elf Fashion Guide.
Similar to Santa’s, but actually more like Nintendo’s Link, the green or mixed red and green pointy hat often have bells at the pointed tip that jingle cheerily while they break their backs making stocking stuffers and cleaning reindeer waste.
The tunic is the uniform of the elves, depicted as short or long sleeved (depending if their tasks are outdoor or indoor) is again either green or a mixture of green and red. Of all of the elves’ clothing, this is most pragmatic, basically a medieval style t-shirt.
Elves are notoriously proud of their strong legs and the form fitting leggings they favor to wear are a testament to this pride. Elf leggings have been spotted as green, red, mixed, yellow, striped red and white and beyond. With the massive variety of leggings, assuredly these colors and patterns denote some form of elven hierarchy known only to them and the Old Man.
The final and some may argue the most “elfish” article of clothing the Christmas elves wear is the curly pointed shoes. You may have your doubts about the hat, tunic and leggings, after all these could also be the elements of medieval cosplay, but once the curly shoes are introduced you know you’re dealing with a magical being, for only a wondrous creature could literally make their toes curl backwards constantly while working awhile hours in Santa’s Workshop.