Top 10 Weirdest Fireworks

posted on 12/31/13

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The bright lights, the smoke, the smell of grilling, the pops and snaps and flashes. Going back to 7th century China and spreading to the rest of the world, Fireworks have been dazzling the citizenry for centuries.

The ancient history of fireworks speaks volumes of the human condition, when we want to celebrate or honor ourselves and our difficult times and trials, we want to make the sky explode. We’re willing to risk life and limb for that glorious sight, smell and feeling of the sublime, that we have filled the sky with color. In modern America this desire to conquer the sky continues to spring eternal, before New Years, the flash-and-bang peddlers come out of the woodwork, retail stores that have lain dormant for months spring open full of colorful exploding goods. With their outlandish packaging and crazy names, we present 10 of our favorites:


10. Gorilla Warfare

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9. Motel Hell

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8. For Your Eyes Only

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7. Great Pretender

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6. Forceful Movement

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5. Big Fat HissEE Fit

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4. Perfect Silence

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3. Shock It To Me

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2. So What Are You Look’n At

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1. Bearly Legal

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0. Neighbor Hater

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